Self Harming

When the child hurts themselves on purpose as a way of dealing or coping with very difficult feelings, painful memories or overwhelming situations and experiences. It is getting more and more common among teenagers and within social groups aswell as being influenced from social media platforms that the child is a part of both within their friend's circles and beyond.  Social media platforms and the wider access to the internet brings alot more exposure to children from a very young age.

Some have described self-harm as a way to:

• express something that is hard to put into words
• turn invisible thoughts or feelings into something visible
• change emotional pain into physical pain
• reduce overwhelming emotional feelings or thoughts
• have a sense of being in control
• escape traumatic memories
• have something in life that they can rely on
• punish themselves for their feelings and experiences
• stop feeling numb, disconnected or dissociated 
• create a reason to physically care for themselves
• express suicidal feelings and thoughts without taking their own life.

After self-harming, the child may feel a short-term sense of release both emotionally and physically, but the cause of their distress is unlikely to have gone away. Self-harm can also bring up very difficult emotions and could make them feel worse than they were originally feeling with feeling of regret post harming.  They will often try to hide their arms and tops of legs or portions or other areas where they have harmed or cut themselves and cover up often in nice weather and in turn bring out anxiety symptoms.   It's also noted that sometimes a child that self harms could be quite overtly socialable and confident externally yet once they become alone, they struggle to regulate emotional control and self harm.

Even though there are always reasons underneath someone hurting themselves, it is important to know that self-harm does carry risks. Once you have started to depend on self-harm, it can take a long time to stop.   The child will often go to extreme lengths to find an object to hurt themselves with.  

If you suspect your child self harms, its important to approach the subject with care, avoid judgement, offer support and contact professional help.